AR does change her premises quite a lot. As to TVA, I have not yet started my reread in earnest, so my memories are, like, 20 years old, but my interpretation of Marius and Armand's relationship was that Armand (human) was sexually aroused but Marius was not (he was drinking blood and enjoying arousing Armand). I could be wrong though. I also think there's some room for confusion in that AR occasionally talks about vampires' penises being hard, but I think she just means that their whole bodies are hard. One consequence of this, though, is that they can penetrate people without actually having an erection, as with Marius and Pandora. Anyway, that's my take.
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(Warning: slightly sexually explicit comment below...)
AR does change her premises quite a lot. As to TVA, I have not yet started my reread in earnest, so my memories are, like, 20 years old, but my interpretation of Marius and Armand's relationship was that Armand (human) was sexually aroused but Marius was not (he was drinking blood and enjoying arousing Armand). I could be wrong though. I also think there's some room for confusion in that AR occasionally talks about vampires' penises being hard, but I think she just means that their whole bodies are hard. One consequence of this, though, is that they can penetrate people without actually having an erection, as with Marius and Pandora. Anyway, that's my take.